There was this one time I blogged about this old shoe box I have, where I keep any paraphernalia that has sentimental value to me. I haven't looked at the box since that last post, but today I was looking for something to paste in my journal, so I lugged the box out again. An ordinary let's-dig-through-the-past moment.
I looked through everything, and a chunk of the junk in the trunk had to with X(ceh, sejak bila aku jadi orang yang ada cerita sensasi sampai kene ada code letter ni?). X was my friend in high school. One year older, quiet in person(I rarely actually talked to him in school), very lively over the net, sent me the best emails.
Looking over the emails, the cards and the souvenirs again, I've come to realize that he was probably one of the nicest friends I ever had. The best emails. Random quotes from Oscar Wilde and lyrics of a favourite song. Dumb jokes, and the kindest words.
I screwed it up.
It is for things like these I dislike the person I was back then, because it took me too damn long to grow up. I think any ounce of common sense and maturity only appeared after high school onwards. Between childhood and the duration of high school(I call them the Crazy Years), I messed things up a lot, and X is among a number of things I particularly regret.
Ceh, is this the afternoon soap opera? No lah, I didn't do anything like get married to his brother who happened to have inherit the family fortune and then convinced him to change his will and leave everything to me, thus leaving his family penniless. Tidak.
I was just the ultimate friend-of-the-opposite-sex from hell. I was clingy, I expected too much, I was over-sensitive. I took things too seriously. Huh. So we contacted each other less frequently once he finished school, even rarer once I was done, and then we moved on to other things and didn't keep in touch. That was that.
I'm sorry I was so stupid. He was one of the nicest friends I ever had.
***
Totally digging BreakEven by The Script. Screw you music snobs.
***
Becky is finally coming around! Displaying increasing signs of a magnificent manja attitude, she neatly arranged herself between mom and kakak to snooze while we were watching American Idol.
Speaking of cats, I met the cat with the handsomest face I'd ever seen at Miss Salmi's house the other day. I wish I had taken a picture! When I saw him, I thought it was the most macho face on a cat I'd ever seen. He wasn't a Persian or a cat of some sort of pedigree or anything, he was just a normal grey and white cat with a stumpy tail and some healed wound scars on his body from previous cat fights. But he had the most perfect face, and he was a tremendously nice cat. He always heeded Miss Salmi's calls, he would lazily blink at her(a smile!), and at other times he would act like a kitten, playing and jumping about and pawing wooden logs.
As I told kakak, I may have encountered my True Love, who unfortunately happens to be in the form of a cat.
exaggeration and tall tales galore
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
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6 comments:
hmm... im curious. its seems that a lot of people around me have some sort of interesting other side at high school that i dont have a chance to know. huhu. oh well. we were all kids.
yes! we should've taken that handsome cat's pictures!
dah la name frankie *wink*
I agree with that description of the 'adolescent' period. Did many stupid things myself. Ignorance ain't bliss. It hurts very very much once you stop being ignorant.
wow that first section of your post reads like an entry of my private blog. by that i mean, i've experienced much the same thing, many times over. ): very un-fun. but kan at least all of that is in the past tense :) not the friendship, of course, but the ugliness. LOOK FORWARD TO CHINESE NEW YEAR eheh.
i like people who love cats. THANK YOU FOR NOT HATING CATS T_T 99% of people i know do. fools, they don't know what they're missing....... or, you know, they DO know what they're missing and would rather sit it out d: cats are evil creatures. if they looked like toads i bet nobody would sayang them anymore hahaha
eh. what is your email address ah. i like to email people and your mentioning emails reminded me that i would like to email you too d: usually i send some random shit to certain groups of people so come let me include you!
Paraphernelias about sekolah rendah is really funny. Now with facebook, makin senang nak detect kawan sekolah rendah. Apelagi ateqs, this is the time to create your own soap opera! Go search him on facebook! Send him back those emails! and let him be teary eyed and reminded of you and sighing " Oh, i have always loved reading your emails, where have you been?".
yeah, the script, i expected to be everything that is typical about a new british band but i was slightly surprised.
pegi rumah miss salmi! aaarghh jeles jeles. i rindu everyone.
You guys pergi rumah miss salmi??? I wanna go!
anna:maybe everyone had some secret side that even staying together 24/7 in a boarding school couldn't reveal!dum Dum DUM!!(bunyi suspense)
Frankieeeee....I LURV you!kalaulah die a proper person....
Lisa(whom I still think in my head as Aki!):Ah, you described it well. It DOES hurt once you stop being ignorant and are actually aware of the consequences of your past actions.
Kero: CNY!I learned a special CNY line dance oredy. Gong xi, gong xi.
cats are perfect. sombong a lot of the time, but perfect. Those who hate cats are fools, but sometimes I consider myself a fool for worshiping a cat who chooses to ignore me according to her mood :p Cats ARE evil!
whee, I love emails!(my enthusiasm betrays my lameness in the sense I rarely receive them). my address is the very straightforward(and boring) atiqahmokhtar@gmail.com
nani:hahahaha, my very own Cerekarama. Nanti aku betul2 buat kang. pastu end up with lots of awkward silences.
The Script, wheee.based in the UK now, but they're actually Irish! somehow that just increases their appeal.
hari tu kat Miss Salmi's place we were reminiscing about infamous Nani's Moments. Gah, i wish you were there skali, it would have been terrific.
aijud: Tulah aijud! too bad you had to work(heh, so janggal to say that. I have a friend actually working in a 9-5 job!). I wish you could have come that day.
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