I want to dance like Molly Ringwald

I. got tickets. to go see.

PHOENIX!

I am so excited cannot tahan. Cannot tahan!

And of course I have to tell you how it was more of an impulsive buy, how I didn't even know they were coming until Ticketmaster emailed me about it. I didn't even know they had come out with a new album! But I do have all of their old ones in my mp3 player(tabik terima kasih kepada kakak), and I do like a bunch of their songs. So I blearily bought tickets the next morning the minute they went on sale(bangun straight from bed, tak gosok gigi ke ape terus keluarkan debit card and ready at the computer).

Whoo! So excited,so excited! Have I mentioned this? Sangat teruja. I cannot breathe, I am so psyched.

Of course kakak introduced me to them, who else I know would listen to some french electronic-influenced alternative rock band? Anyway, I've listened to the two singles off the new album, 1901 and Lisztomania, and they are awesome. 1901 got me hooked right from the opening notes, and Lisztomania is the type of song I hear a while ago and think it's ok, and then listen to it again after a while and suddenly it's fabulous. Someone on youtube made a video to the song with mashed-up dancing scenes from some movies from the eighties, most notably The Breakfast Club, and I must say it's spot on because listening to the song makes me want to dance like that too. The very idea that I'll get to dance while listening to them live(multiplied by the fact that the gig is for standing area only, can you imagine the energy?), ARGH! Too much excitement jammed through my pores, I cannot wait. I'm going to march straight to the record store and get Wolfgang Amadeus Phoenix right after I'm done with exams. I am in dire need of some new music, and I think this will be a nice addition after Fleet Foxes.

How can I not put the songs up? Can you picture it? Hearing and recognizing the opening notes and screaming like crazy, swaying as the drum beats kick in, and singing the song at the top of your lungs with this intense feeling of satisfaction and giddiness?


Dancing like it's the eighties is strangely uplifting.

Save Your Scissors For Someone Else's Skin

One thing I remember, and I'll probably always remember, is this: sitting on my dad's lap on raya morning. I think I must have been 7 or 8, it was the morning of the first day of raya, my dad had just come back from raya prayers. We were watching tv while waiting for mom to get the rendang and ketupat ready for our traditional raya breakfast. My dad was sitting on the couch, I think it was one of the two green leather armchairs we used to have, the ones the cats loved to scratch. I was sitting on my dad, leaning against him with all the trust and intimacy that astonishes me when I think about it now. I was watching tv while sitting with my dad , laughing as he ate some nuts and got a weird look on his face, forgetting that it was raya and thinking that he accidentally ate something when he was supposed to be fasting.

Few years down the road, I went crazy.

I got an email from my dad, and the words are careful, so, so, careful. And it made me want to cry , it made me want to hug him and say I'm sorry I went crazy, I'm sorry I drove you away, I'm sorry I couldn't and still can't be a better daughter to see past your words and your demeanor, I'm sorry for the times I gave up and gave in to the idea that our relationship at the moment will be as good as it gets. For thinking God was punishing the both of us. I'm sorry that we are both so stubborn and too alike to compromise, I am so sorry, I am so sorry.

***
Sometimes, thinking about qiamat helps. It puts things into perspective. It makes me look at anything that's troubling me and think 'there just isn't enough time for this shit'. And that includes inconsiderate people, study blues, weight and zit issues, casting failures, flailing crushes, and the like.

Things that have been keeping me sane/happy: Kellogs, chocolate croissants and mochas in the morning, big tables, slouchy black sweater, Arnott's Scotch Finger biscuits, La Vie En Rose.

City and Colour, ftw.