exaggeration and tall tales galore

Monday, May 12, 2008

Un foulard gris

you see, the way i see it is this. If i do all the procastinating things NOW, then i won't have any excuse to procrastinate further when I've actually finished procrastinating and start doing the work. and therefore, that it why i am blogging, when i actually have QM1 homework to do.

I'm in the mood for acoustic sentimentality tonight, so:

Step 1: Listen to Toothpaste Kisses.
Step 2: Listen to the now famous Moldy Peaches' Anyone Else But You.
Step 3: Listen to World Spins Madly On by The Weepies(props to Aijud for enlightening me on these folks)

I bought a gray scarf (je achete un foulard gris) and i adore it, i really do. Sometimes i feel like anyone could just pull on the two ends of the scarf while I'm wearing it and asphyxiate me to death, but aside from those moments, i really dig it. I used to think that a scarf wouldn't make much of a difference and was more of a fashion accessory rather than a properly functional item, but that was dumb, and I'm wrong, i know. A scarf makes a whole lot of difference.

You know what? To whoever it is that's reading my blog, and not ridiculing or scoffing at it; to you i say thank you. If it's kakak, or nani, aijud or anna, anyone who knows me or doesn't, thank you for reading. thank you for bothering to peruse the nonsense i come up with. I don't know why you're reading it in the first place, and you may not even think much of it, but just know that i find the idea that you're reading absurdly cool. and quite mind-boggling, to be honest.

I was, am, very happy today, for no apparent reason, not really. But I am, even though i can feel the last tinges of cheeriness and incomprehensible giddiness fading away even as a type this. Allah has been so good to me, so good. Alhamdulillah. To be honest, i don't think i deserve to feel this happy. I am happy to be happy, but at the same time, i keep looking over my shoulder to look out for the next stroke of bad luck or mood-swing. Which indicates something bad, though I'm not sure what. It's bad to have grown so acclimatised to feeling down that you're wary of feeling good without legitimate reason.

i made a pact to get my shit together today, and though i've made that vow and broken it countless of times, maybe, just freaking possibly; it'll be different this time.

God, i love good music. and i love my gray scarf.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

salam ateqs!
Hi! it's d 1st time i gv comment! :)
actually,i've been reading ur blog for some time... just dat i dunno wut to comment...
it's good to hear dat u'r feeling happy rite now...hope u'll be showered wif happiness n blessings even more. amin.
so,all d best n gd luck!!! :D

whilewhiting said...

you know, i really like the idea of the scarf. and i can imagine matching them up with clothes and stuff. but as i said, i just love the idea. i dont really like wearing them.

because it makes me feel like suffocating. like hanging myself.

haha. but i envy people that can wear those scarf looking so fashionable. haha. im sure your one of them. so, ape lagi, nnti show off to me okay. your grey coloured scarf.

:P

Anonymous said...

yep, for once you're happy with your life.... despite all those blogs you wrote about how you used to hate things that do not go according to your plan... Now you're happy and that's good. Ei, I just finished my last paper yesterday. My practical starts in 3 weeks time. Guess where i will be working? At PnP Taxation and Auditing Services Sdn Bhd, Pak lang recommended it actually...haha.

Aki said...

Awh hehe. I know life has its ups and downs, and I used to be bothered by that fact too.

Like when I'm feeling extremely happy, I would start thinking, "Hmm, I wonder when I would feel down. I wonder what my next devastating problem would be."

But if you can get so lost in getting sad/angry/down and not thinking about happiness at all when you're in the dumps, why not do the same for happiness? Enjoy it! Forget looking out for your next problem. It'll come when it comes and you'll deal with it like always and be happy again.

Please tell me when my level of optimism starts to annoy you and I will shut up.

Anonymous said...

well, my friend i should thank you instead. for providing me stuff to do when im clueless to do something. ure my favourite pastime.

happy to hear that you're happy and well, guess what I HAVE A POLO GRAY SCARF.
omg great mind thinks alike.

Anonymous said...

atiqahhhhh!!!!!wuiling's here..=)))..wow..a gray scarf..gotta show show n post it here wey!!atiqah in scarf?how does she look??i have no idea wey..gorgeous luh!!tangkap gambar tangkap gambar with the scarf eh..teehee..n glad t hear tat u're happy to b happy!!take care my dear..muackss..tata..=))))

A said...

eh.eh. baiknye semua org! how nice of everyone to comment. i mean, seriously. i was pleasantly surprised to find 6 comments brimming with goodwill when i checked my mail today.

afnan: hi afnan! omigosh, i had no idea you were reading. i am linking you up ASAP. thank you, and i wish you everything happy as well,amin! :D

anna: hahahaha, pakaila anna, i'm sure somewhere out there ade the perfect scarf for you, that won't make you feel suffocated, and in fact, will make you feel about 2 and a half times more cheerful ;)

alamak, betula. one thing i notice about Ozzies can, they make anything look cool. pakai selipar jamban during summer boleh nampak cool, pakai scarves and boots pon gaye habis. unfortunately, i'm not capable of that. pakai selipar jamban macam nak pegi jamban, pakai scarf macam....i don't know, tapi tak fashionable la,haha.

yes, i know who: hey awak! yea, i heard you're back and about to start ur practical. WAAAAAAAH!!!! i'm so impressed. you're going to be interning at a proper auditing company!!!!

aki: you're right!the whole part about getting lost in happiness the same way i get lost in stupid moodswings was spot on.

your level of optimism isn't annoying at all, in fact, unflagging optimism is now officially welcomed here. optimism is the new black. hell yeah.

nani: hahahaha, you KNOW you've got a good friend when they're kind enough to call you their favourite pastime. grazias, amigo. and yes, great minds think alike! and great minds have good fashion sense too! haha

wui ling: hiiiii wui ling! ala, i cannot tangkap gambar and show you la, i'm so malu :p the scarf is pretty, but when i wear it, it looks weird!haha. you just have to imagine my face(and neck), then picture a gray scarf wrapped around it.

mostlyepiphanies said...

Its wonderful that you're happy! And I agree, sometimes when I'm so happy, when things just go smoothly and stuff, I start to think about some sort of comeuppance. Like hey, this happy thing is somehow very fishy, maybe its cushioning a looming disaster or something!

Ah, the mind. And how it comes up with reason for us to go all paranoia.

I love scarves! And The Weepies! And I enjoy reading your posts a lot!

A said...

aijud: betul2. you think any good time is just the calm before the storm. which is a tad pessimistic, but we're all working on repairing that point of view, yes?

aww, thank u. you should update your blog! i've already established from the start that i'm your ardent blog-groupie,haha.